2024 OPENING WEEKEND (RECAP)

Walleye fishing | Stay at Ballards Resort Lake of the Woods, MN
Walleye fishing | Stay at Ballards Resort Lake of the Woods, MN
Hey Sportsfans! 
 
Walleye fishing on opening weekend, Lake of the Woods, Ballard’s Resort… is there a better time to be had?
 
For the second year in a row, opening day has had favorable weather… ask anyone who has been visiting for years, that rarely happens.
 
In case you haven’t heard, the boys are back in town, and here’s what they are saying…
 
Capt. ZB…  He’s on the big fish. Just look at the picture he sent in with Ron and his 28″ walleye. 
 
Capt. Andy… “Go with eye candy Andy, he is on fire.” Realistically, Capt. Andy has found success catching eater sized fish in 20-26′. 
 
Capt. Tim… It’s an exciting time to be on the lake. When fishing close to home, there is an element of surprise, never knowing what species of fish you might reel in next. Walleye, perch, northern, sturgeon… it’s anyone’s guess. Capt. Tim also mentioned something about the male walleyes squirting a certain substance all over the guides… but I don’t know how far in depth we should go on that topic. 
 
After two days of fishing, the guides are starting to spread out. Some staying in the Rainy River, others venturing as far as Knight Island. End of story, the fish are biting and the excitement for the season is over the top!
 

EPISODE 15

Walleye fishing | Stay at Ballards Resort Lake of the Woods, MN
Walleye fishing | Stay at Ballards Resort Lake of the Woods, MN

Part FIFTEEN – continued from last week’s episode –

 

Sally exhaled and released her grasp… Rusty was yanked into the 4’ X 2’ spearing hole and disappeared below the blazing cold surface of the ice.

 

With the intensity inside the shack, neither Sally nor her recently departed partner had heard the approaching snowmobile. The perp was dressed in snow camo and wore a Canadian toque pulled low over a face mask that resembled a tiger trout.

 

Motioning Sally toward the door with the point of the gun, they exited the shack and entered the darkness of the frozen tundra. Winter greeted them with blustery gusts of white sandblasting pellets, arriving sideways from the horizon, and piercing their eyeballs.

 

This prompted her memory of leading Rusty (by hand) down the saltwater flats of Seychelles in a midsummer windstorm. They were on a fly fishing adventure halfway around the globe (her dime) when straight-line winds pushed in off the coast and raised a violent stream of beach on the return route to their glamping location.

 

With a compass in one hand and Rusty in tow with the other, she successfully navigated their return to the basecamp.   Only now… Sally was not in charge of the situation, and God help her kept man who was predictably less than stellar in situations concerning life and demise.

 

 “Let’s go” announced the voice and strong armed her to the saddle of the snow machine. Then a bandana covered her eyes… A helmet was slapped on… And hand cuffs were clamped on each wrist attached to the side rails.

 

The throttle revved and a thunderous hole shot launched the sled from the scene. Leaning ahead to balance her blindfolded forward motion… A distinct scent arose under the helmet shield.

 

It was a long-ago fragrance from her sometimes-rebellious youth. Canadian cigarettes… Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em. Specifically, in her case, on late night rendezvous along moonlit lakefront shorelines.

 

The silence of death had overtaken the inside of the fish house. Somewhere below the surface of the ice was Rusty Flathers.

 

 To be continued —

EPISODE 14

Ballards Resort Lake of the Woods, MN

Part FOURTEEN – continued from last week’s episode –

Rusty couldn’t breathe! With the bobber out of sight he bent at the knees like Lasha Talakhadze attempting a world record clean and jerk. His adrenaline-fueled quadriceps exploded with upward momentum. For a finishing move he lunged to his toes with a violent hook set.  Arms held high!

Fish on! Then in a blink he was armpit deep in the icy trough hanging on for dear life. Sally scrambled to the floor of the shack holding his legs in desperation.

During the post-cold-war years the Mangrove Killifish experiments were halted. Professor Cosmoid Scale was now the last known living participant with hands-on knowledge of these international testing secrets.

Many years retired… He spent his pasture days nibbling smoked salmon and enjoying lunchtime martinis. His off-grid location was only known by the RCN. He had “willingly” agreed to confinement (like witness protection) and there was a classified maple leaf file at Canadian HQ stamped with the title: “Someone who knows fishy things.”

Each year coinciding with the Lenten Season, there would be a box of lutefisk delivered, and inside the parcel would be an update as to whether his standing request to return to The States would come before the Canadian Relocation Board. Previously, these requests had always been denied.

To Cosmoid… The furthest matter from his mind was the Mangrove Killifish and what had happened when the books were closed on the project. Like many fisheries biologists before him his only goal had been to make aware the potential of an amphibious fish.

Grasping at the britches around Rusty’s ankles… Sally had dropped the Glock in an attempt to secure a stronghold in this tug of war.  

Suddenly, the undeniable “click” of a handgun near the back of her neck froze all movement. “Let him go, and you might live” was the order.

— To be continued —

EPISODE 13

Ballards Resort Lake of the Woods, MN

Part THIRTEEN – continued from last week’s episode – 

This was it. His relationship with Sally. The chance to publicly clear his name. The reel possibility of a prison term. And the truth of Lefty Van Clutterbuck’s atrocious demise. Everything hinged on the balance of getting ONE bite.

Rusty Flathers had graduated summa cum laude from the acclaimed Fisheries University in East Jesus, Indiana. He studied under renowned Professor Cosmoid Scale who (secretly) later became prolific in the research and development of the Mangrove Killifish.

Said fish was amphibious… Known to leave water for extended periods (days-weeks-months-years). This species was tested in closed-door experiments funded and labeled CLASSIFIED by the Government of Canada and the (RCN) Royal Canadian Navy.

In his early tenured years during summer break Professor Scale would travel to Lake Ontario and act as liaison between fisheries biologists and political figureheads. The days were long and mentally draining, but there was good work being done. 

Barring the Timbo Horton coffee (he preferred dark walleye roast), and his Canadian assistants’ never-ending ability to rip darts, all was well in his world. This was cutting edge discovery, experimenting with mutations.

Rusty attempted to steady himself over the 4’ X 2’ chainsaw opening below the floor of the fish house.  It was cold enough in the shack to see your breath, as beads of sweat dripped into his reflection on the water. 

Sally stood by with a Glock G43X at the ready and pulse in check. She was a “gamer” slowly shifting weight back and forth anticipating action. The proverbial moment of truth had arrived for this avenging couple.

Without warning, the cork danced to the right side of the water filled rectangle and vanished below the surface!

–To be continued–