Season TWO – Episode 12 – “The Fish Gods Must Be Crazy”
The caravan of anticipatory anglers came to a screeching halt when they reached Yello Dawg pass. Groups of guides and guests exited vehicles and quickly made their way down trails to the fishing grounds. The morning was chilly and there was fog below the banks hugging the waters of the Windrush River.
Jackie Loonsuckle unpacked gear from the rear of a Chevrolet Suburban. He would be assisting with the film shoot today and was also thinking “The Fish Gods Must Be Crazy” to put these two women on the same waters on the same day.
Sally Squatsnfishes had film rolling as she dawned a new Women’s Fin Fisher 7-Layer Ripstop Jacket presented by Helly Hansen. She then slipped comfortably into a new pair of fly-fishing waders, grabbed her gear, and made her way toward the water. The camera crew had positioned itself at the river bottom, looking for a vertical-up shot, as she would make her way down to the river’s edge.
Designed for women the Fin Fisher slides on and off with ease per the chance of changing weather conditions. The jacket is windproof, waterproof, breathable, and damn near catches fish for you.
Feeling particularly spicy on this gorgeous fall morning… Sally opted out on the winding walking trail that led some forty feet down to the river bottom… And instead chose a beaver slide technique by going directly downhill on her fanny and then sticking a perfect two-point landing within inches of the water.
Her entourage applauded while lead-film-man Archer Sting roared approvingly, “I got the shot! I got the shot! Sally, you are so AWESOME!”
Ellie Waylayer made rounds up and down the trails of the Windrush River, assuring that her guests were appropriately supplied, and guides were attending to their required duties. Her attention to detail was flawless and as an operations person she made the Gold Rope Ranch hit on all cylinders.
There was an extra hop in her step today as well… Ellie had decked herself out from head to toe in the most current women’s fly-fishing fashions… She wore a splendid pair of light gray Patagonia waders, an ultra-blue Simms wading jacket, and topped it off by wrapping her blonde hair in a pony and slipping it under a dark-blue Costa visor.
Her guests thanked her with vigor as she made her way from group to group. Once everyone was dialed, she would have some quiet time for casting thoughts and nymphs for trout.
Sally was more than capable of getting trout to take a fly. Much in the same way she was capable of luring Jackie Loonsuckle to her side for some “advanced casting lessons”.
“Shouldn’t I be able to get more distance on my streamer,” she posed to Jackie. “Maybe my casting elbow is at an awkward angle?”
And just like that he was standing directly behind her with both arms wrapped in hers and mouth close enough to whisper directions in her ear. “Here, let me see if I can help,” he offered.
“Casting a streamer doesn’t have to look as pretty as you. We just need to slow down your cast and widen your loop.”
Of course, Sally knew full well what it took to cast across the river. She could hit a gnat in the ass with a streamer at 60 yards. And as the patchy morning fog continued to lift, she could also hit Ellie Waylayer where it hurt and watch her hackles go up.
The two women stood directly opposite each other, standing in knee deep water of the roaring Windrush River. Ellie preparing to cast and mend a nymph… Sally with Jackie’s arms wrapped around her, falsely casting a streamer.
Meanwhile, Archer Sting had the cameras rolling. And Sally’s support team watched with spirit.
“OK, I think I’ve got it now,” Sally indicated to Jackie in more ways than one. She had successfully placed a reputed hook in the side of his mouth and Ellie was on the opposite bank with a similar one in hers.
The further Sally cast the streamer, the tighter Jackie held her close, and the more infused Ellie became. Rushing your cast can cause problems. So can doing it in the arms of another woman’s man.
“OK, let me try it alone now,” Sally said as she faced Jackie with her fantastical smile. “I’m ready to get hooked up!”
Her first cast was at a 45-degree angle downstream from Ellie. Keeping the rod tip low, she pointed at the fly and let it sink deeper.
With a slow, steady retrieve, she made a few strips and then would pause for the streamer to take more current. “Keep that tip down,” she reminded herself.
At that exact moment she felt the line tighten and instead of raising her rod she correctly met the strike with an extended stripping hand and under tension placed the hook in the fish’s mouth. At that point… It was game on!
Right… Left… Downstream… Upstream… Bank to bank the rainbow trout took and gave line before submitting to the net. This was a big, weighted fly she was throwing. She had no intention of catching anything but big, weighted fish.
Ellie didn’t miss a beat. She had her nymph in the water and was mending the line before the hundreds of flashes from the photo blast of Sally and her catch was complete. With the fast-racing current she was fishing her line 20ft above the trout and was at the ready with the slightest twitch of the indicator (bobber).
Her first cast didn’t produce so she reset and presented the fly upstream to keep the fly, weight, and indicator in a straight line. Approaching the feeding column she again anticipated a bite, but this time it was cut short as Sally’s streamer hit the water downstream of her rig, and literally pulled a trout away inches from her nymph.
“The Fish Gods Must Be Crazy,” Jackie Loonsuckle again thought to himself, as he distantly watched this dueling battle of anglers (SALLY & ELLIE) begin to unfold.
– To Be Continued –